Ultimate Joy

Withered

Posted on: December 13, 2010

My heart has been pierced today with sadness, withered and dry.  It doesn’t help that blizzard conditions exist here in Chicago – 40+ mile per hour winds, snow on the ground and bitterly cold temperatures.  Still I know that God is up to something.  There is change in the winds and I want to be in the middle of God’s plan.

My husband and I are taking the day to clean out some long-overdue places within our home.  I’m tired of the junk pile.  I grow weary from the long-forgotten things that somehow remain hidden deep in the closet where no one can see.  I wish that the snowplows outside my door would just whisk all the junk away so I wouldn’t have to deal with it.

My emotional junk causes me even bigger problems.  Cleaning out that would lead to an even bigger mess.  Yet, God sees my personal failings and He is not afraid to deal with them.  He sees the pain and the baggage from my past.  And despite all that He comforts me and gives me strength to grow beyond the ugliness in my heart.

That’s because it is in these cold, stinging places that I hear God’s softest voice.  In the heaviness of the heart, God is there to lift me up.  In my loneliest hour, I sense His closest companionship.  In this season of winter, that I sense His gentle, warm touch; in the harshest rejection that I know His deep embrace.

I have several decisions that are weighing me down.  Some life-changing; others significant, but less dramatic.  An internal voice feeds my insecurities…my inability to lean into God’s plan.  I want to be obedient to Him, yet sometimes I stay stuck in my messiness unsure of where to go next.

Still, God sanctifies me; He ordains me to do His work.  I take comfort in his words, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm, plans to give you a hope and a future.”  (Jeremiah 29:11)

I don’t know where His great love will lead me.  I do know that God does not mean to leave us in defeat.  And so while I feel withered, I know that He will lead me through this current storm; He will take me through every storm.  So as the snow piles up outside, there is really only one path:  trusting in Him.

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